Just once...

The guest room saga continues. Is it crass to compare the entire project to the birthing process? I don't care. I feel like I'm in transition. I wanna PUSH already, but noooooooo...

I have to put a second coat of paint on the walls. Then vacuum the floor. We have to hang the chandelier. (Which was going to be a fan. But those are so...I don't know. I wanted the chadelier instead. It's pretty!) Then patch the big gaps in the floor with wood putty and let it dry. I suppose I could start putting on the trim paint while the floor stuff dries, huh? (Yes, I already primed the trim for whatever good THAT does...) And then: Saturday we can rent the ezVSander at Lowes and sand, sand, sand. Any bets on whether or not the sander "eliminates over 97% of airborne dust" like it says it will in the brochure? Hmmm. Me neither. But it's got to be less dusty than the wallpaper was coming down. I'm still blowing that stuff out of my nose for heaven' sake.

And then we can start putting the oil-based finish on. 3-4 coats. And maybe it will dry sometime in my lifetime because it HAS to because the "do-it" guy (Charlie) is coming next Thursday to install the sink and faucet and two electrical outlets. And then we'll patch and prime and paint the wall where he has to tear it up. After we clean up the dust he'll make. Geez.

And then maybe in another lifetime I can do the FUN stuff like make the dust ruffle and curtains and strip and paint the iron bed - careful this time not to paint over the brass that I will have painstakingly exposed. And then just watch. Someone will want to come stay! In. The. Guest Room. Which means I'll have to clean the REST of the house and figure out what to make for dinner. Geez Louise!

I'm not normally this grumpy. Honest. But I really want this room redo OVER for gosh sakes.

"I WANT THE DRUGS NOW!!!!! WHAT???? WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S TOO LATE FOR AN EPIDURAL AND I'LL JUST HAVE TO DEAL????? ARE YOU SURE THIS IS WORTH IT?????"

Okay. Maybe I'm being a bit over-dramatic.

But once - just once - I'd like to be able to actually paint a room with one coat like the can promises I can.

I consider myself an expert of sorts when it comes to giving birth. Did it twice. One regular, one C-Section. Both hurt less than this guest room thing. Really!

Maybe I'd feel differently if I had been 57 when I gave birth...

Ya think?

Oh - and please know you're welcome to come stay in the guest room any time! Just be lavish with the ooohs and aaaahs. And make the bed.